If The Beatles were right, love is all we need and money can't buy it. Given that we change, and relationships change as we grow older, could it be that love changes as we age?
Singing about love can be easier than trying to define it. Ancient Greek has four distinct words for love: ag�pe, �ros, phil�a, and storg�. So what's being asked is whether ag�pe (a consuming passion for the well-being of others) or phil�a (a companionable love) replace �ros (a love of passion) as we age?
The love stories that we've been brought up with are mainly about young people. Rarely do we hear about the young lovers as older people. And the youngster's focus doesn't seem to shift away from each other's physicality and whatever sexual desire they might have for each other. The idea of growing old together doesn't get a jersey.
Older adulthood is not without its challenges with this population facing transitions such as retirement, empty nesting, and changes in health.
Research tells us that five of the most highly rated elements of successful romantic relationships for older adults are honesty, communication, companionship, respect, and positive attitude. (Other elements include self-acceptance, institutionalised religious practice, socialising with friends and neighbours.) This means that �ros takes a back seat as other elements feature more prominently.
Most ageing couples drift into what seems like a comfortable attraction settling into a deep emotional attachment. They seem to understand their partners more and try to adapt or change in a way which is more compatible and comfortable to their partner: maturity (of relationship), tends to lead to compatibility. Any differences seem to get smoothed out as partners better understand each other.
So, if you're an oldie and your relationship has changed, that's fairly normal. It could even be argued that love becomes (gets) more beautiful and awesome as time progresses.
Neil Flanagan is a bestselling author. One of those books is BLINK! The Speed of Life. A free copy of this book is available from Neil when you email him at neil@neil.com.au and request a copy.
By Dr Neil Flanagan
Article Source: Does Love Change As We Age?
Singing about love can be easier than trying to define it. Ancient Greek has four distinct words for love: ag�pe, �ros, phil�a, and storg�. So what's being asked is whether ag�pe (a consuming passion for the well-being of others) or phil�a (a companionable love) replace �ros (a love of passion) as we age?
The love stories that we've been brought up with are mainly about young people. Rarely do we hear about the young lovers as older people. And the youngster's focus doesn't seem to shift away from each other's physicality and whatever sexual desire they might have for each other. The idea of growing old together doesn't get a jersey.
Older adulthood is not without its challenges with this population facing transitions such as retirement, empty nesting, and changes in health.
Research tells us that five of the most highly rated elements of successful romantic relationships for older adults are honesty, communication, companionship, respect, and positive attitude. (Other elements include self-acceptance, institutionalised religious practice, socialising with friends and neighbours.) This means that �ros takes a back seat as other elements feature more prominently.
Most ageing couples drift into what seems like a comfortable attraction settling into a deep emotional attachment. They seem to understand their partners more and try to adapt or change in a way which is more compatible and comfortable to their partner: maturity (of relationship), tends to lead to compatibility. Any differences seem to get smoothed out as partners better understand each other.
So, if you're an oldie and your relationship has changed, that's fairly normal. It could even be argued that love becomes (gets) more beautiful and awesome as time progresses.
Neil Flanagan is a bestselling author. One of those books is BLINK! The Speed of Life. A free copy of this book is available from Neil when you email him at neil@neil.com.au and request a copy.
By Dr Neil Flanagan
Article Source: Does Love Change As We Age?
No comments:
Post a Comment
Informations From: Revisi Blogging